Magical Thinking by Pamela Bennett
“Begin again…”
Do you believe in magic?
Forget about “abracadabra.”
If magic words exist in this world, then “Begin again” are two magic words that jumpstart my days.
When my work days seem never-ending and looming deadlines collide too closely with new deadlines, stress level spikes and life becomes a race against the clock.
Too often we think the only way to succeed in life is to work harder and harder until we convince a boss we have earned a promotion or a raise, or if we are extremely lucky, a promotion that comes with a raise.
As most people know, the newspaper business is a different animal, with salary raises few and far between as publishers and owners try to convince advertisers to support paper products along with online content.
Mine isn’t the only profession, however, with deadlines and stress. Far too many of us are on the “work, then work some more” merry-go-round.
So what should you do about it?
Try another magic word—Jump!
I mean off the merry-go-round, of course, not the closest cliff.
Or off the couch, or the bed where you are binge-watching Stranger Things on Netflix.
Or even…out of the depressed state that keeps you prone with worry, or grief, or fear or indecision.
You can always begin…again.
Even if you fell off the wagon and back into addiction, or find yourself wallowing in that bleak place you think is okay to be because victims are allowed to wallow.
The truth is, none of us have unlimited hours. We are mortal beings with limited years and no-one knows how much time is left to work, play or waste.
No matter how old we are, it’s simply vital to find a way to live the life we want to live.
Mary Oliver wrote a poem called “The Summer Day.” It describes how she spent one summer day closely watching a grasshopper.
Oliver asks:
Who made the world?
Who made the swan, and the black bear?
Who made the grasshopper?
She describes the grasshopper, with its “enormous and complicated eyes” then goes on to say:
I don’t know exactly what a prayer is.
I do know how to pay attention,
how to fall down into the grass,
how to kneel down in the grass,
how to be idle and blessed,
how to stroll through the fields,
which is what I’ve been doing all day.
Tell me, what else should I have done?
Doesn’t everything die at last and too soon?
Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?
My “one wild and precious life” is waiting.
What will I do with it today? Right now?
I can always “begin again.” I can resolve not to let work hours fill all available hours and pull up a book chapter on my computer, work on a scene and get lost writing about my characters. Or I can get out my loom…or sit at the piano and try to teach myself the same song I’ve been trying to play for months.
Or close the computer and go kiss one of my grandbabies.
You might take a bike ride or strum your guitar or paint or sketch or train for a marathon.
No matter how busy your work schedule is or how long you’ve kept your creativity buried you can always “begin again.”
I watched a documentary recently about Joan Didion, who began writing at about age five and never really stopped. She is 82 and still writing. She’s won the National Book Award and was a finalist for the Pulitzer Prize in literature. She wrote about the Hippie generation in Slouching Toward Bethlehem and about tremendous grief after she lost her husband and daughter in The Year of Magical Thinking and Blue Nights.
Didion said life should be lived “recklessly” and each individual should “take chances…make your own work and take pride in it…seize the moment.”
“And if you ask me why you should bother to do that, I could tell you that the grave’s a fine and private place, but none I think do there embrace….”
Forget about how tough you had it yesterday. Begin again and use another magic word, “Reinvent.”
No one will give you the life you want to live. You have to create it, one word, one color, one step at a time.
Shouldn’t you start now?
Yes Pam you are so right I will try and follow what you said. I am
92and the years do creep up and think how many do I have left. Well
will not think about that now. Liked your story
Love Mom
I’m happy you liked the story, Mother–thanks for reading the blog!
You should always be doing whatever you want to do–hope you will
let me help you with that, too!
Love you,
Pam